Neil deGrasse Tyson whines about the waning of our thirst for space exploration, but what he doesn’t seem to realize is that all of the knowledge he needs is right there in the bible.

On Wednesday, an atheist offered a “prayer” in the Arizona State Legislature. Among other entirely reasonable thoughts, State Representative Juan Mendez stated, “I would like to ask that you take a moment to look around the room at all of the men and women here, in this moment, sharing together this extraordinary experience of being alive and of dedicating ourselves to working toward improving the lives of the people of our state.” What a heathen.

Of course, this “prayer” offended the delicate sensibilities of the forever persecuted Christians who were present in the audience, and some thought it was the perfect opportunity to further pander to their base of slobbering religious morons. Representative Steve Smith took Mendez to task for deeply offending God, and, on the floor of the house on Thursday, asked “for repentance of yesterday.” Smith then asked his colleagues to stand and “give our due respect to the creator of the universe.” God did not hear Smith, however, as the Lord was busy planning his next deadly natural disaster for which he will be endlessly praised.

A French right-wing activist walked into the Notre Dame Cathedral earlier this afternoon and shot himself in the head in front of 1,500 people. Before doing so, the man, 78 year-old Dominique Venner, placed a letter upon the altar which outlined his fierce opposition to France’s recent approval of gay-marriage, and he wrote that it was time for more radical resistance. Apparently such resistance includes like-minded people blowing their brains out, and, I must admit, I think Venner was really on to something. That’s why I say hey man, nice shot. What a good shot, man.

After any disaster, the airwaves and the internet are jammed with people thanking God that they survived, and commentators fall over themselves to offer their prayers for the victims. For obvious reasons, this has always really bothered me. If there is an all-powerful, omniscient God, didn’t he allow (if not cause) the calamity in question to happen? When one prays for the victims of disasters and for their families, are they not asking the same party behind all of the death and destruction to heal the resulting suffering? Call me crazy, but that doesn’t make a whole lot of fucking sense. If my logic is flawed, please feel free to let me know what I’m missing. Anyway, the tornado that devastated Moore, Oklahoma yesterday has once again put this puzzling phenomenon on display, but not everyone affected by this tragedy has fallen victim to such sheepish thinking.

While standing on a massive pile of rubble amidst human carnage, Wolf Blitzer asked a local resident named Rebecca whether or not she “thanked the good lord” that her son survived. To my great shock and delight, Rebecca answered that she was an atheist and let out a hearty laugh. Looks like God’s precision twister of death failed to smite the blaspheming non-believer. It appears that the good Lord – just as he did in 1999 – will simply have to send yet another massive tornado to Moore and try his hand at smiting the sinners there once again.

Cedric Cuthbert, a 49-year-old pastor at the St. James Church and Disney World employee, was arrested on suspicion of viewing child pornography while actually on the job at the children’s theme park. According to the arrest affidavit, semen was found in Cuthbert’s Disney office. There is no word if any genetic material was found on the Mickey suit, however.

Investigators stated that Cuthbert viewed multiple inappropriate YouTube videos posted by teen girls to whom he sent messages such as “you are so cute! Great sexy bodi! Send me a private vid.” That a pastor at a church would be busted for child porn and soliciting sex from minors isn’t exactly shocking; what is surprising is that Cuthbert was actually soliciting members of the opposite sex. Way to go, Cedric.

Have I ever told you how much I love religion? I adore it. Without the endless parade of unfathomable stupidy to mock, I would simply be lost. So, ironically, you can add me to the list of people who religion has given purpose in life.

One of the most popular claims among adults who have imaginary friends is the idea that life simply cannot come from non-life. The irony of this argument is that the individuals offering it seemingly have no problem believing that two fully formed adults magically appeared in the jungle. However, there is a very plausible theory on how life was first generated, and that theory is called abiogenesis. The theory suggests that life on Earth formed from organic compounds through an entirely natural process; not from a sky wizard snapping his fingers. I’m certainly no scientist, so I will leave it there and let the biologist in the video above give you the basics.

It’s important to keep in mind that even if the theory of abiogenesis was somehow shown to be entirely false, that would not be any evidence that man-made religions are true. Just as the inability to say definitively what preceded the big bang (even though there are plausible theories) does not make the bible the word of God. Gaps in scientific knowledge simply mean we haven’t fully figured it out yet. Are there holes in theories such as evolution and abiogenesis? Sure. It would be dishonest of anyone to say otherwise, but that does not mean that both processes are not observable facts. The gaps in scientific knowledge will fill in over time as we continue to research and learn, but religion will still be just as archaic and stupid as it is today. In sum, simply because people of faith are unwilling or unable to understand the complex process of abiogenesis, does not mean that it did not occur.

I’m pretty sure I posted this before my blog went on hiatus, but I lost a lot of content in the transition. Anyway, it’s a great video from the always brilliant Richard Dawkins, and it belongs on my site. So, forgive the re-post. Also, I’m writing as if anyone actually reads this shit. I need to start advertising this again. Comments and hate mail were fun. Talking to myself not as entertaining.

Simon Amstell explains why it’s rude to mock people of faith. He may very well have a point, but that certainly won’t stop me.

This is how gay-loving nerds who wear lab coats think that the universe came to be. Everyone knows that two white people magically appeared in the jungle 6,000 years ago.